Dares at work

One-point dares:

• Ignore the first five people who say ‘good morning’ to you.
• To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your ears and grimace.
• Leave your fly open for one hour. If anyone points it out, say, “Sorry, I really prefer it this way”.
• Walk sideways to the photocopier.
• While going in an elevator, gasp dramatically each time the doors

… view full post

Church Bulletins

Thank God for church ladies with typewriters. These actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services:

• The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
• The sermon this morning: “Jesus Walks on the Water.”
  The sermon tonight: “Searching for Jesus.”
• Ladies, don’t forget the rummage (yard) sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house.

… view full post

Binary toys

This deserves some serious pimpage.

My friend Neb has just launched binary toys, a collection of interactive windowless virtual toys (10 by default with an import option) made up of springs, muscles, and masses.

Originally created by Soda, based on simple physics, these toys exhibit complex behavior and are surprisingly life-like.

Life-like to the point that … view full post

Riaan Cruywagen

• Riaan Cruywagen never has his back to you, in fact Riaan has no back.
• Riaan Cruywagen is fluent in twenty seven of the eleven official languages.
• Riaan Cruywagen knows the news before it happens.
• Riaan Cruywagen knew you would say that.
• Riaan Cruywagen is cryogenically frozen every night for EXACTLY eight hours. His brain impulses are monitored during this and used as templates for

… view full post

A classic Zapiro!

© Jonathan Shapiro

Useless facts and thoughts

Via: http://www.iwantoneofthose.com/showThings.do

• There are 2 rules to being a success in life. 1. Never give out all the information.
• Don’t you hate it when someone asks you a question and you don’t know whether it’s rhetorical or not?
• What did the first person to milk a cow think they were doing?
• Having a smoking section in a restaurant is like having a peeing

… view full post

Religions of the World

TAOISM – Shit happens

HARE KRISHNA – Shit happens rama rama ding ding

HINDUISM – This shit happened before

ISLAM – If shit happens, it is the will of Allah

ZEN – What is the sound of shit happening?

BUDDHISM – When shit happens, is it really shit?

CONFUCIANISM – Confucius say, “Shit happens”

7th DAY ADVENTISM – Shit happens on Saturdays

PROTESTANTISM – Shit won’t happen if … view full post

On Version Control

Via: http://it.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=150493&cid=12622794

Open Source calls it: alpha testing
Microsoft calls it: 1.0
Google calls it: shhhh…top secret
Apple calls it: unsubstantiated rumors

Open Source calls it: beta testing
Microsoft calls it: 2.0
Google calls it: beta testing
Apple calls it: rumours with possibly some substance to them

Open Source calls it: release candidate
Microsoft calls it: 3.0
Google calls it: beta testing
Apple calls it: copies are circulated to the usual … view full post

Zapiro cartoon

© Jonathan Shapiro

I couldn’t resist…

(p.s. I snagged this from somewhere…)

UPDATE: More Hasselhoff insanity. Brilliant but whacked.