Top Ten Signs Elizabeth II Is Tired Of Being Queen

From the CBS's Late Show with David Letterman Top Ten Archive:

10. Has scaled back her grueling 2-day-a-year work schedule
9. Uses scepter to snake her clogged sink drain
8. Was spotted in Soho hotspot making out with Colin Farrell
7. Been granting several private audiences to Sir Jack Daniels
6. Refers to Prince Charles as that "jug-eared tight-ass"
5. Knighted dude at 7-Eleven to get out of paying for Slurpee
4. She's destroyed dozens of priceless palace artifacts with her radio-controlled model trucks
3. Very little attending to matters of state -- a whole lot of watching "The Young and the Restless"
2. Changed her name from "Elizabeth II" to "Matrix II"
1. Took off her top at a Coldplay concert

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